my hometown Mavs...

FINALLY GOT THAT SPURS MONKEY OFF THEIR BACKS!

This day has been eagerly anticipated for many years. When I was a kid I went to a few Mavericks games that always ended with a sigh. They stunk for a long time. It's a good thing I'm not a sore loser. I know too many San Antonio Spurs fans and they love to rub it in year after year after year...

Well, not this year chumps! For once I don't owe anybody a six-pack of beer on this series.

Go Mavs!


We all went to Tyler, Texas last weekend for a family wedding. It was a great time! They had their wedding and reception by the new pool in their 1.5 acre backyard. That yard was so big that Coan could hit his real golf balls instead of the plastic ones!

Nothing says "Welcome to our party!" like a boat full of sodas and suds:

Yep, that's a camouflage duck hunting boat. It's loaded up with ice, beer, sodas, and a couple of kegs standing guard. I'm trying to imagine how that would work at our house. I think I need to locate a canoe for our next party. The wedding was fun and the reception sounded like it lasted way after midnight when I turned into a pumpkin.

While we were there Coan got to play his first round of golf! Only 9 holes, but he made it with only one meltdown next to the 7th green. He wanted to tee up his ball and whack it at the pin. We finally had other golfers playing up on us so I told him to get up there and putt so we could get moving. That wasn't part of Coan's plan and he decided to let the entire front nine hear his displeasure. After that he skipped the 8th hole, then happily two putted on the 9th to end the game with a birdie. He has asked me to talk about his golf day at least 25 times since then, so I told him I would write it down and we could read it as a story. The exciting adventure will appear here soon!

I will be posting some of my favorite photos on the right side of this blog. You can click on them to view the larger version. The 1st edition of Quirkee.com comes out on June 15th! The Preview Edition is still up for viewing. The column I'm writing will have different stories than the ones here and will change every Thursday. They will be archived there in case you miss one.

Until next time...

I was asked to write a column...

for a new online weekly magazine. You can read my new column at Quirkee.com. It is called Because I Said So and is about life as a stay-at-home-Dad. The first article is titled "Why Daddy?" I think you will like it. The magazine is still in Preview Edition mode and will be published every Thursday. Enjoy!

I started messing with HTML...

and 6 hours later I am still messing with it! I never attempted to write HTML and have been learning it so I can create my own pages. If you notice the blog is changing frequently in the next few days it's because I am still playing around with the code. It's really addictive! I should probably go to bed now...

I was driving down the road...

with a screaming baby behind me! You probably know that baby + car ride = sleeping baby. Julia is commonly referred to as “Speed Baby”. No, not that speed, the movie Speed with Sandra Bullock. Sometimes if you are driving too slow she’ll explode! Julia’s magic number is 40 mph. If I’m driving any speed over that she’s good. I don’t know if it’s the vibrations of the van or just the thrill of the ride! She’s also a big fan of bumpy roads and there are plenty of those to choose from around here.

This brings about some challenges during our daily outings. On the way to take Coan to school there are several school zones. Since I can’t afford another ticket and defensive driving is painfully boring, it’s a must to make sure Julia is tanked up on Mama’s milk before we hit the road. Being full makes her happy and I think she’s unaware of the 20 mph zones I’m going through. Most of the other roads in suburbia are between 35 and 45 mph, so I get up to that speed quickly when necessary. I know it’s not good for fuel consumption to have a lead foot, but I’m willing to spend the few extra dollars a month to keep my eardrums from bleeding. I look at it as my contribution to Big Oil’s executive retirement plans. They love drivers like me. My mother doesn’t, however, so I try and slow it down some when she’s riding along.

I've realized that I change my route while driving to make sure I am in a constant flow of traffic with her. Instead of taking what might be the quickest way somewhere, I’ll take the path of least resistance. It’s usually the faster route, although I have a hard time convincing Stephanie it’s true. This action is known in our family as the famous Grayson Shortcut. My Grandpa used to drive so far out of the way that it added several hours to a road trip, or an extra 20 minutes to the drive home from a restaurant. This was painful as a kid if I drank 5 Dr. Pepper's at dinner. He called it the scenic route and the road less travelled. You get to see things you normally wouldn't if you took the main roads. All I wanted to see was a bathroom so I didn't pee in his back seat! My Dad and his brothers do it, too. It’s an inherited gene and one that came in handy when I worked as a courier. It now comes in handy when Julia starts screeching like a little piglet.



It’s funny to think about the ways our children train us to do what they want. Isn’t it supposed to be the other way around?

there was a Mother's Day rhyme...

that you never found in a greeting card.

Here's to all the Moms out there

This day is special, we really do care

About the things you wanted us to

Like eating our veggies

Even if they tasted like poo

You always knew what was best for us

That's why we always listened

Well, maybe not all the time

But you never called us rotten

We were little angels

You say it's true

Except for that time we got tattoos

But you still loved us

When we caused you stress

And that's why we love you

We promise to remember it

When our kids fingerpaint our shoes

It will be twelve more months

Until the next Mother's Day

We hope you have a great year

And don't you worry, we won't forget

To wash behind our ears

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

I looked a little weird...

when I created my self-portrait for the SELF by Self website! I took a picture of my shadow and then a picture of my face to put on it.

It's OK, you can laugh. Stephanie already did. Several times, actually. Before I trimmed my furry grassy shadow in Photoshop (think linebacker with a tiny head) she said,

"You look like you're going to ring the bell!"

Apparently I looked like Quasimodo, the Hunchback of Notre Dame. She also thought I looked like a cop in those sunglasses. A green Yeti cop, maybe.

another week had gone by...

and I'm finally getting around to writing about it! Last Saturday was the carnival at Coan's school. Lots of games, great hotdogs, and a petting zoo! He didn't much care for the games or hotdogs, but kept wanting to go back and see the animals. I didn't take any good pictures, so if you have ever been to a preschool carnival or a petting zoo you can close your eyes right now and think about it.



Go ahead, I'll wait.



No hurry, my kids are sleeping.




OK, wake up! Did it take you back to your childhood? Me either. The only thing I remember about preschool was a kid named Jon Pickle. I swear that was his name. I was car-pooling with him one day and when we got to his Mom's car the back windshield was completely shattered. It was still intact where it should be, but cracked from top to bottom. I guess it was the Texas heat. It looked like it was going to cave in at any moment! Needless to say, we rode in the front seat with his Mom. I remember some of the strangest parts of my early childhood, but I'll save the rest for future blogs.

I had a night out with the guys on Monday! Well, just 2 others, Aaron and Patrick. It's nice to hang out with only adults every now and then. Patrick is the one who has the This is Texas Music website. It's a great site where he reviews bands, CD's and books, too. Patrick invited us to go see an acoustic songswap at Antone's. There will probably be a review coming up on his site, but if you can't wait go check out Brandon Rhyder. Look for the song called "Freeze Frame Time". It is about his little boy and it's a really good tune.

Julia has taken her first ride in the Big Swing out front! She loves it.



She has started to roll around a lot! If you put her on her back she rolls to her belly. If you put her on her belly she looks around for awhile and then tries to roll over to her back. Sometimes she makes it and sometimes she gets stuck halfway lying on her arm. This brings about the high-pitched squeek like a cat has been stepped on.

Speaking of cats, has anybody seen Lula?



She's been gone since Monday night. We've already lost one dog and 5 fishes this year. Hopefully she's still alive out there somewhere. In the last 14 years she never went more than 2 houses away so we are thinking she's left us for greener pastures. Maybe she went to some house with no kids, no dog, no extra cat, and 3 fish.

Yep, we got 2 new fishes!



One is a Black Moor and the other is an ornamental goldfish with stripes that I forgot the name of. We've had them for about 2 weeks now, but I wanted to wait to write about them until they looked like they were going to live. Coan decided to name them Tiger and Lefty (Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson). OK, it was my idea, but he liked it!

That's all for now. I'll let you get back to your productive days.

I needed to write about something...

so you all wouldn't lose interest. Well, there's not really much to write about this week. I don't think it's writer's block, I'm just sure poopy diapers are not what anybody cares to read about. That's what most of my day is like right now. Little poopy diapers from her and BIG poopy diapers from him! Ok, I've used the word poopy enough for today.

Most of the day Julia sleeps, eats, smiles a lot, and laughs at her big brother being goofy. I didn't think it was possible for her to be more beautiful, but every time she smiles I stand corrected.



Mama and baby girl went to Tyler last weekend for her cousin's wedding shower and bachelorette festivities. Coan and I stayed here for a "Guy's Golfing Weekend". The Champions Tour was in town for the FedEx Kinko's Classic. Our Saturday went like this:

7:00 am: Coan wakes me up with his putter and bucket of golf balls in hand.
7:15 am: "Daddy, can I go downstairs and putt? Get up! C'mon, it'll be fun!"
8:00 am: Waffles have finally been consumed during breaks from putting.
8:30 am: Still putting and watching Golf Channel infomercials.
9:30 am: Still putting, but he's now dressed and ready to go to the driving range!
10:30am: Whacking golf balls with big swings
11:00am: Putting on the practice green
11:30am: We arrive at the tournament! He's excited to see the "real" golfers.
12:45pm: Still putting, this time at the home practice green demo tent.
1:45 pm: Coan starts to fade (not his swing) after we found a hat and shirt.
2:00 pm: We walk back to our friend's house. He falls asleep in my lap on the couch.
3:15 pm: In the car heading home to have guacamole, chips & queso!!
3:45 pm: Still putting. He's addicted.
4:00 pm: Out back with his clubs practicing and not leaving too many divots. This goes on for the rest of the day. Inside putt, outside big swings. The FedEx Kinko's Classic is, of course, on TV the whole time.
8:30 pm: After convincing him that he can putt more after his bath he takes a break.
8:35 pm: The bucket of balls take a bath, too.
9:00 pm: He's putting up and down the hall wearing nothing but his new golf hat.
9:30 pm: Coan, his putter, and the bucket of balls go to bed.

That is how our Saturday went. 14 hours of golf in some form or another. The way he's going he'll be the next Tiger Woods! I can't complain, though, as I can think of many worse ways to spend a day.



I guess I did have something to write about after all. Soon I'll be able to tell you more about Julia's days, when they consist of things other than just eating, sleeping, pooping, and smiling.